FUCK LOWK3Y
For more infomation >> Juss vs Dark Kento [CoLahaust Short Fights] - Duration: 0:42. 
Doesn't look like a boss...
Looks like a big empty nothing so far
Darkness, though
Oh, I... don't know what the fuck I'm doing
I know that looked really dangerous
Oh fuck!
Jordanix1871: Oh I forgot all about the guys
Jordanix1871: That crawl along the floor
Jordanix1871: Forgot about those fuckers
Jordanix1871: That's hilarious
A nice trick is that if you wail on the B button really fast
...nothing happens
Jordanix1871: Oh, is that the Drink [Estus] button?
No, it's the roll
Get-the-fuck-out-of-here button
Jordanix1871: Oh, okay
If you wail on it really hard, then...
Jordanix1871: I see, when you stood next to the guy exploding
Jordanix1871: Yeah
Jordanix1871: Because the game knew that's where you wanted to be
If I can get them to explode next to a torch
It lights the torch on fire
Jordanix1871: Neato!
I might go back and do that for the other torch
If I can get this fucker to follow me
Jordanix1871: Or you could use a Flame Butterfly
Jordanix1871: And just light these fuckers
If it lets me
Jordanix1871: Oh, I see what you're saying, okay
Jordanix1871: Gotcha gotcha gotcha
Jordanix1871: It seems to me that if those guys that lunge at you
Jordanix1871: Get hit with the fire, it's bad for them
Yeah
Jordanix1871: I think they're covered in oil themselves
Jordanix1871: Maybe?
Okay
I'm just gonna ignore them now
They don't seem too powerful
Lot of Petrified Dragon Bones to go around
The theme of this area seems to be darkness
Aaand I got invaded
Jordanix1871: (laughs) And again, and again... and again
(laughs) And again, and again and again!
Yep
Jordanix1871: You know how hard it is to find a meme for that?
Jordanix1871: If I could make any meme, that's what it would be
Jordanix1871: "But we did it. It's done."
Jordanix1871: "No, we have to shoot it again!"
Jordanix1871: "And again, and again and again!"
From different angles!
Jordanix1871: Yeah, exactly
Jordanix1871: Look at this guy
Jordanix1871: He's just standing over there, when you got invaded
Jordanix1871: He's waiting for ya
Jordanix1871: He ain't scurred
I think he has a poisoned sword
Jordanix1871: Did you bring your shield out yet?
Jordanix1871: Not that you'd use it, I know, but...
Nope
Still just taking it like a champ
Jordanix1871: I like how you lit that bonfire
Jordanix1871: Even though he's coming for your face
(laughs) It's because I'm a professional
Jordanix1871: Or not bonfire, but you know what I mean
I just pushed him into the flames
And he's on fire now
It didn't really do much, though
Jordanix1871: No it didn't do much? Okay
He's got a poisonous sword
That he really wants to poison me with
Oh he got a backstab in, the prick
Jordanix1871: (laughing)
I was mid-heal, so...
Jordanix1871: You're supposed to be the one backstabbing!
Yeah, yeah
I also jumped and also fell off a cliff
That I didn't see
This is going swimmingly!
Jordanix1871: Oh, like against the final boss?
Jordanix1871: Onward Christian soldier, marching as to war?
(laughing) This is where I belong!
Right down here!
Jordanix1871: (laughing)
Jordanix1871: Ahhh
Jordanix1871: I just got done witnessing the backstab
Jordanix1871: And the near roll-off-the-cliff death
Oh you're gonna love me rolling to the fire twice, then
Ah, fuck
I can't hit him!
It's like I'm blind down here
Jordanix1871: Have you tried targeting him?
No
Jordanix1871: It's not cheating when you press the right joystick to target him
Jordanix1871: Just so you know
Okay
Fuck!
Okay, there he goes
Holy shit, this is stressful
There's a bunch of doors...
Jordanix1871: This is so awkward
Jordanix1871: This is like a high school/junior high dance
(laughs)
Jordanix1871: With two teenagers awkwardly moving around each other
Jordanix1871: One standing in the fire...
Jordanix1871: This is high school all over again
I'm sure I can find Hoobastank somewhere here
On YouTube
Jordanix1871: (laughs)
Jordanix1871: Oh yeah, this is where you get that item
Jordanix1871: Yeah, good stuff
These guys don't seem to value their lives very much
Nope
But this is where you get that item they keep asking for
Jordanix1871: The... I don't know
Jordanix1871: We'll find out in a second
Jordanix1871: But yeah, you know what I mean
Jordanix1871: The Smelter Wedge or whatever it is
Yeah, the Old Iron Scepter
Jordanix1871: Yeah, that's the one
Jordanix1871: I was grasping for words there, thanks for getting it
Timely as always
Jordanix1871: I guess there's so much I actually forgot about
Jordanix1871: That's crazy
Okay, yeah it's just right here
"Scorching Iron Scepter"
Jordanix1871: That was nice if you to donate all your health
Jordanix1871: To that guy that was blowing up!
Yeah, well...
...I live to serve
Jordanix1871: There you go
Jordanix1871: And as long as you're going down
Jordanix1871: You're going the right way
Okay
Jordanix1871: There'll be one that will take you up
Jordanix1871: And that'll take you to the samurai dude
Jordanix1871: When the time comes
Jordanix1871: "I put my time down for Fume all the time"
Jordanix1871: "Because it's like, an insta-summon"
Jordanix1871: (laughs) Yeah yeah, Fume Knight is just insanely hard
Jordanix1871: They'd definitely be able to accept help every time
Jordanix1871: I was telling Keaanu earlier
Jordanix1871: That the Fume Knight was the one
Jordanix1871: The first knight in the Dark Souls two games
Jordanix1871: Where I wasn't sure if I would ever be able to beat him
Jordanix1871: Like it was this moment of doubt
Jordanix1871: "How am I gonna be able to beat this guy?"
Jordanix1871: "Is this gonna be happening?"
"Wait until he doesn't have enough Smelter Wedges for the worm things"
"I know where everything is"
Jordanix1871: So I just typed, "I told him to save two wedges"
Jordanix1871: "For the Fume Knight"
Let's see if I was smart enough to do that
I have three
Jordanix1871: AKA ream me
Jordanix1871: Nice!
Jordanix1871: Oh, you're almost to the bottom anyways I think
Jordanix1871: So yeah
Jordanix1871: Good call
I see a fog door
Jordanix1871: Okay, so definitely don't go through it
Jordanix1871: Have you fought some big giants down there?
Um, no
Jordanix1871: Oh, you need a total of four!?
Jordanix1871: Ah, for some reason I thought it was [two]
Jordanix1871: Shit!
We could go back and look for one
Especially when I get this bonfire
There is one down here, right?
Jordanix1871: A bonfire? Yeah there is, yeah
Jordanix1871: When you look at the fog door, should be on the right
Jordanix1871: Down a... yeah
Jordanix1871: Yeah, exactly
Jordanix1871: "Right side bonfire", yeah
Jordanix1871: You'll have to fight some giants probably
Jordanix1871: To get to it, but...
Okay, I see those things that I can annihilate
I'm on the right side, but I've reached an end
Okay, I see
Jordanix1871: Yeah, no it's down there
Jordanix1871: There should be a little pathway to a room
Yeah, I got it
Jordanix1871: Cool
Jordanix1871: Good
Okay, so...
Jordanix1871: And did you see the places where you can put the wedges?
Yes
Jordanix1871: Good
Jordanix1871: There's one on each side
Jordanix1871: Of the boss arena
I think there's two on each side
Jordanix1871: Okay, that's probably why you needed the four
Jordanix1871: And why I was dumb and said
Jordanix1871: Just to save the two
Yeah
Yep, he's here
Jordanix1871: Okay
Jordanix1871: Sweet
Jordanix1871: "You're a bad friend Jordanix1871"
Jordanix1871: "No one should go through that hell"
Jordanix1871: I'm telling you, I did it
Jordanix1871: So I want to see him do it
Jordanix1871: I just want him suffering
Jordanix1871: You know, misery loves company
Jordanix1871: But thanks for calling me out on it
Jordanix1871: I loved it, Lord_of_cinder28
Jordanix1871: Okay, yeah, now Reddit has taken care of business
Nice
We have the Smelter Wedge
Jordanix1871: Okay, good stuff
(hearty laughter)
See ya later!
That's funny
Okay, so I can die faster
And get put out of my misery?
Jordanix1871: Well the bigger sword does more damage
Jordanix1871: But it's super slow compared to the smaller sword
Jordanix1871: Which will do slightly less damage
Jordanix1871: But, it also swings faster
Yeah
Jordanix1871: But, you know
Jordanix1871: "Marcel works," alright
Jordanix1871: It's a huge sign of respect, Marcel
Jordanix1871: When I actually learn someone's name
Jordanix1871: As opposed to just their gamer handles
Jordanix1871: And I have to associate stuff
Jordanix1871: And yeah, the... yeah
Jordanix1871: You're on the list
Jordanix1871: Did you walk through the [fog gate]?
Yep
Because I missed a story, yeah
Jordanix1871: The fog gate?
Yep
Jordanix1871: Sweet
Jordanix1871: I'm going to mute my Skype for a moment
Jordanix1871: So that I can experience this fight
Jordanix1871: Without knowing if you lived or died, okay?
Sure
Jordanix1871: So now I am experiencing it without your sound
Jordanix1871: And I'm experiencing just...
Jordanix1871: Normal, on the fight
Jordanix1871: I'm just watching it like anyone else
Jordanix1871: Any other loser would watch it
Yep
Jordanix1871: Part of my is hoping you'll beat him the first time, but...
Jordanix1871: Part of me is really hoping that he'll put you down
Jordanix1871: So that he can be as hard for you as he was for me, but...
Jordanix1871: I'm a terrible person, I admit it
Jordanix1871: (chuckling)
Yep, he got me
Jordanix1871: Ahh blood, I want blood
Jordanix1871: I love it
Jordanix1871: (chuckling) "A hundred bucks on the big guy"
Jordanix1871: Yeah, once he buffs his sword
Jordanix1871: It'll be a little bit of a different fight
Jordanix1871: Actually, some say it's easier when he buffs his sword
Jordanix1871: Because then he puts all his eggs in that one basket
Mmh
True
I liken him to Artorias
And the reason I'm not completely freaked out
By how good he is
Is because he's got nothing on Artorias
Jordanix1871: So when I first fought this guy
Jordanix1871: I thought he was insanely fast
Jordanix1871: I'm like, "Holy crap, this guy is so fast"
Jordanix1871: "I'll never be able to keep up with him"
Jordanix1871: And then eventually I fought him so much
Jordanix1871: That I could tell his tells
Jordanix1871: And he actually slowed down for me because of it
Jordanix1871: I'm like, "Okay, I can see this attack coming in"
Yeah
With Artorias, that's how you have to fight him
There's no other way to do it
Jordanix1871: Okay, yeah
You have to learn that motherfucker back to front
Jordanix1871: Mhm
But that's why I wanted to see you play the DLC
So I could get to see you fight Artorias
Jordanix1871: Ohhh, gotcha
Because Artorias the be-all, end-all
Of one-on-one guy fights
Jordanix1871: Gotcha, yep
Jordanix1871: So is the Dark Souls 1 DLCs
Jordanix1871: Were they bigger than the Dark Souls 2 DLCs?
Jordanix1871: Were they longer or more involved, or...?
One second, he's pumping up here
Jordanix1871: Sure
Jordanix1871: Oh yeah, take your time man
Ah fuck
Jesus fucking Christ
He reminds me of The Pursuer now
Jordanix1871: Hm
(heavy sigh)
Jordanix1871: I'll wait 'til you're done
Yeah I'm having a really hard time answering questions
Jordanix1871: Yeah, take your time
Jordanix1871: Yeah man, don't worry about it
Jordanix1871: I'll talk to you once this goes one way or the other
I'm dead, so...
Jordanix1871: Oh he's buffed his sword, gotcha yeah
Jordanix1871: Like I said, a lot of people find this part easier with the buffed sword
Jordanix1871: Because he only has one weapon
Jordanix1871: Keep to his... the sword side
I always roll the fucking wrong way
When he does his big sweep
Jordanix1871: Okay yeah, because I found that was the only time
Jordanix1871: Where I really wanted to roll into the weapon
Jordanix1871: That one way
(sigh) Ohh, Christ
Oh please do what I tell you do to instead
God damn it
(frustrated sigh)
God damn it
(painful scream from game character)
Apparently when you're human, you scream when you die
Jordanix1871: Nice
Yeah, I think I've got his standard play down
Jordanix1871: Sweet
But notice how he's always killing me
When he gets his big sword out?
Jordanix1871: Okay
So that's what it is now
Jordanix1871: Like when he buffs his sword, you say?
Yeah
And Artorias, if you slap him around enough while he's buffing
It'll cancel his buff
Jordanix1871: Okay
So you never actually have to fight him in a buffed state
And even if he does get one off
It only lasts about sixty seconds
Jordanix1871: Okay
Oh god damnit
I rolled backwards into one of his fireballs
Jordanix1871: Okay yeah, gotcha
Holy FUCK
Just leave me for like, four seconds!
Jesus Christ, man!
Jordanix1871: Okay, he's buffing now on the stream
He fucking took me absolutely apart
I started by...
...just trying to gauge him
Trying to learn his moves
Jordanix1871:Yep
But he just fucking fed it to me, so...
Jordanix1871: Gotcha
Jordanix1871: Okay yeah, now you're at four Estu-
Jordanix1871: No, sorry, now you're down to one
But that's the problem is that I...
Jordanix1871: I think you triple-drank on that one
The problem is that I'm fighting him...
I have to fight a boss before I can fight the second boss
Jordanix1871: Yep
So it's the second boss that I'm dying to
Jordanix1871: Mhm
Oh my god...
Okay, I'm getting tired now, Jordanix1871
Jordanix1871: Do you want to come back to him later, or...?
Jordanix1871: Are you gonna do him tonight?
No, I'm gonna fight him 100 more times
Like a fucking idiot
Jordanix1871: (laughs) Yeah yeah!
Jordanix1871: And you know, I guarantee if tomorrow night you fought him
Jordanix1871: You would take him down first try
(laughs) Probably
Jordanix1871: Keep at it though, keep at it
Jordanix1871: I'm enjoying this
FUCK
Holy shit
I can't even get like, five hits on him when he buffs
I also feel like I walk with iron boots
And a big golden cape, whenever I'm in there
Jordanix1871: Ahh, gotcha yeah
It's like in Majora's Mask, when you put the iron boots on
Ca-clunk, ca-clunk, walking around
Jordanix1871: Yep
That's what it feels like
And I feel like, "Why am I not running properly?"
But it's really just that time is fucking slowed down
Because of all the adrenaline
Just get the fuck away from me!
Jesus Christ!
Yeah, I definitely need a fucking greatshield
That would solve all of my problems
Jordanix1871: Okay
Jordanix1871: Do you have one that you said
Jordanix1871: You pumped some souls into already, or...?
(laughing dryly) No, no I don't
So that might be what I do to fight him
That's what I had to do for Artorias
I had to go and...
...pump some serious shit into a...
...a greatshield
Jordanix1871: Yep
What are you doing?
One-
Oh, my god
I press heal, and like...
...FOUR seconds later he starts healing
And hasn't moved at all, from...
(drawing a long breath)
Yeah
I don't think I'm gonna beat him without a greatshield
So
Jordanix1871: Okay, yep
I think I'm gonna call it quits here
Jordanix1871: Yep, don't blame you man
Jordanix1871: It's all good
So I'm gonna find a nice greatshield
Pour a bunch of shit into it
And then I'm gonna switch to it
And then I'm gonna try it agian
Jordanix1871: It's funny, because that's your strategy
Jordanix1871: And I couldn't beat him with my greatshield
Jordanix1871: I beat the entire game with my greatshield
Jordanix1871: And yet I had to put it away for this fight
Jordanix1871: And rely entirely on dodging
Yeah
Jordanix1871: But I totally respect that, man
Well I think that when I fought Artorias
That's actually when I joined the Eagle Shield Covenant™
Jordanix1871: Oh okay, yeah yeah
Because people had said, "Get a really nice greatshield"
"And then fight him"
And so I went and got the Eagle Shield
And then I pumped it to +15
Jordanix1871: Nice
Yeah, I think this is it for tonight
Jordanix1871: Okay, man
"Have Havel's greatshield"
Okay
I might actually go find it
I might go find Havel's set and his greatshield
And look up some of the better greatshields in this game
And go find them
Because I have the whole game opened up now, so...
...I can just go find the stuff for myself
And then pour a bunch of stuff into it
And try again
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