- [Imitating Bill Belichick] "17 scrubs, 12 brushes. Put my socks on."
- Who's the better receiver sittin' right here?
Think about it. - Ahhh!
♪♪
Welcome to "Simms & Lefkoe." Simms the Oracle.
You were in fine form this past week.
- Thank you. - I'll be honest
social was blowin' up. - Whoa.
- "Simms, Bortles is benched! Bortles is benched!"
I think they wanna know— - Yeah. - Did you take joy in it?
Were you sitting at home goin'—[laughing evilly]
- Well, a little because I wanna go, like
"See?" Like, "Listen to what I say."
You know, I don't sit around and just
twiddle my thumbs and watch football.
You know, I study it hard. - Yeah.
- But I'm never happy to see a guy lose his job.
- No. - I've been there before.
I've been benched. I understand that.
But at the same time, I feel like some people
are starting to finally see some of the flaws that I've been
trying to point out to people for the last two years. - Yes.
- You and I both know, since this started last season
because we saw how talented Jacksonville was.
- You love the Jaguars. - I have a man-crush
on more guys on the Jaguars than any other team in the sport.
- Bortles is going to start against the Eagles in London.
- Right decision. - You mentioned that
it's the problem of the team. - Yes.
- "Simms & Lefkoe" is about solutions.
- We are. - Not problems.
And I believe there's something in the air that can fix this.
Love.
So, the relationship between the Jaguars and Bortles
off to a little bit of a rocky patch.
- Right. - I found an app.
- Yeah. - It's a good dating app.
- Sure. - It's called QB Cupid. - Ooh.
- Matching up QBs with teams that need 'em.
- I wouldn't trust you to matchmake anything. Go ahead.
- I have some steamy ones here, Simms.
- Right. Of course you do. - Hot and heavy.
- Right.
First one— Baltimore, Maryland. - Right.
- I think a perfect match for Jacksonville.
RG3.
- No! No! It doesn't work. Swipe the wrong way.
I don't know what to say.
- They already have two quarterbacks.
Why not let him go?
- They don't trust Lamar Jackson
to run the full scope of the offense yet.
The Baltimore Ravens look at themselves as a team
that can go to the Super Bowl.
They are not gonna trade away RG3 cuz they—
If something happens to Joe Flacco
RG3's gonna be the guy that comes in to run the offense.
- This one's got an interesting screen name.
GumpMan5, 25 years old, in a relationship, New Orleans.
Moved a little bit, so willing to move again.
- Oh, OK. - Teddy Bridgewater, Saints.
The most coveted backup of all backups. - Oh, that's right.
- They got Taysom Hill in New Orleans.
- Oh, that's right, Taysom Hill
who we haven't seen really throw the ball yet.
- Doesn't need to. He's incredible.
- He is, and he might be down the line.
But again, sorry, Jacksonville.
New Orleans is not gonna risk their chance
to go to the Super Bowl
with Drew Brees getting a high ankle sprain or getting hurt.
That's why they traded
for Teddy Bridgewater before the season
Jacksonville!
Before the season! -All right.
This one is spontaneous, creative— - What a profile.
- Ivy League-educated. - Right. - FitzMagic.
- OK... - Ryan Fitzpatrick. Come on.
- There's a glimmer there. - Oooh!
- OK? A glimmer. - Yes! Hot!
- You might wanna, like, save that tab, OK, or something.
-What? -Save that tab, like—
- What does that mean? - I don't know. Tab on the computer or something.
- Next one is a little vulnerable right now. - Right.
- Recently got out of a three-year relationship out of Buffalo.
- Yeah. - Didn't really work out
in the small, little rebound in Cleveland.
- Sure. Right. - Tyrod Taylor.
- That is the kind of quarterback that makes sense
in this situation, like Tampa Bay
where there's a third-stringer.
Do they go, "OK, we got somebody here
where our team won't fall apart if the starter goes down"?
- OK. All these people wrapped up in relationships.
I have one that is single. - Oooh.
- And I—It's one of those profiles I look at and go
"I don't understand why they haven't been scooped up yet."
- Yeah, I know where you're goin' already.
- I don't know if you do. - Yeah. - Little-known player.
- I bet. - Colin Kaepernick.
- Oh, yeah, never heard of him. Yeah, I mean, hey, listen.
You know where I stand on this argument.
He should've been a starting quarterback last year.
Should they bring in Kaepernick, just to see how he does?
Just that question.
- Should they bring in Kaepernick– - Just to see what level he's at.
- Sure. - Isn't it their duty?
If they want to win the Super Bowl, isn't it their job to go,
- I do, right. - "Let's just see"?
The point is this.
This is not running back or receiver or defensive back
where they just go, "Run to that hole,"
or, "Cover that guy."
This is about learning a whole offense
and learning all these rules.
And to ask a quarterback to come in at this point of the year
and then just take over and learn up the whole system
it's kind of unrealistic.
That's why we don't see it really ever happen.
- The Jaguars and a quarterback, looks like we're unable
to find a match at this time. - Right.
- But I would argue there is not a better match
than Terrell Owens and Chad Johnson as humans.
- Man, they're awesome. Right.
- I'm thinkin' the year maybe 2004, 2005.
- OK.
- Football season as a team, as a u—
[Door opens]
Speed. I bet that's Doug f--king s--t up.
- We're rolling. - Oh!
- Stop. - What?!
- What's up, man? Chris.
You doin' all right, man? - You gotta be kidding me.
- Congrats, man, congrats. - Appreciate it, appreciate it.
- The Hall of Famer in the flesh. - Yeah, boy! - What?!
- Woo, you look different. - You look golden.
[Laughter]
- There's a gold hue around you. - What's happenin'?
- You're looking good. - You told him to come up here?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - That's awesome.
- We're goin' to get McDonald's after this.
Who's the better receiver sittin' right here?
Think about it. - Who's the better receiver?
- Yeah. -What kind of question is that? - Well, I think T.O.'s one
of the top three receivers in the history of the sport.
- That's a f--kin' lie.
Let me tell you why. - Tell me why.
- He's not the better f--kin' receiver.
He had the better cards dealt to him
and took advantage of those opportunities.
- How do you figure that? - Can I finish?
- No, first of all, I'm gonna stop—
- Can I finish? - No, I'm gonna make you stop right there—
- But listen, listen— - Because I only played
with Steve Young three years. - Who? Who?
- Steve Young, three years, that's it.
- I don't care who you played with.
- Outside of that, you had Carson Palmer—
- Listen. - A Heisman Trophy winner.
- Look where I— - That doesn't matter! - I was in Cincinnati.
You played for the 49ers! - That has nothin' to do with it!
- The Cowboys, the Eagles— - They weren't that good, the 49ers, though.
- Wait a minute! - The 49ers weren't that good.
- These are awesome organizations.
When I came in, I was in the s--t bowl
according to everybody else. - Whoa!
- And I made the most of the cards that I was dealt.
- Bro, I could've played for the Cleveland Browns
and did what I did— - So basically—
-So don't tell me— - I'm not finished talking.
- I played with the Buffalo Bills— - I'm not finished talking. — And got off.
- I'm not finished talking. - I played with the Cincinnati Bengals with you and got off. - OK, Jesus f--king Christ.
- Was there one part of the game
any part of the game that you stole from each other
where you were like, damn— - I couldn't.
I couldn't do anything he did, honestly. - No?
- His DNA, his makeup, his skill set is completely—
I mean, night and day, completely.
The stuff he would do, the stiff-arming people
never f--kin' worked.
I would go the opposite way - [Laughing]
- Cuz I was more of a finesse player.
My favorite thing to watch T.O. do
him and Brandon Marshall
dudes playin' bump-and-run.
Let's say I'm tired— fourth quarter.
They have this f--kin' tug-and-pull where they invite
the contact and wait for you to get a hold and pull by.
How in the f--k? - Yeah, I know. I've seen it.
- I tried it in practice one time.
I'm right there in the same spot. Can't get off.
- So, you're on the Bengals.
What was the day when he joined the Bengals?
- I had lobbied for that big-time with Marvin, with Marvin.
I said—I asked Marvin, you know, a lot, man.
"We really need to bring T in.
I think it would help us offensively tremendously."
- Who was your receiver coach, God bless his soul, that year?
- Sheppard, Mike Sheppard. - Mike Sheppard at the time.
- Dealing with you two in meetings must've been amazing.
I would've loved to have been in a meeting with you two. - Nah, it was easy.
When I'm workin', I'm locked in.
- Yeah, I know you are. I know you both are.
- Yeah, I mean, again, people may think
that we're uncoachable based on the antics
and how we, you know, go about, but when it came to football
like, literally— - That's what nobody gets to see.
- Right, I know. - In the workplace, when it's time to work.
I remember he's tryin' to get me to slow down
on Fridays, remember?
- Yeah. - Man, Fridays.
Man, I'm out there balls to the wall.
- You know how Fridays are, you know?
- It's a chill day. - It's time to taper down.
- I know you were. I know. Right. - Man, listen.
- I'm like, "Dude."
- T was like, "What are you doin'?"
I'm takin' scout team— - Yeah, I'm like, "Bro!"
- And this is well into my 10th, ninth year.
I'm just out there movin'.
- Yeah, the perception is wrong.
- I remember just—
I'm just growin' up. Think about the Hurricanes in the '90s.
- Yeah. - And that's what I grew up
watching, so as a kid growing up
the game of football was about having fun.
When you're in the NFL and you misbehave or they do something
you don't like or you don't follow their rules
what's the first thing they take from you?
- Money. - Money.
- Money. Because that's what they think you value the most. - Right.
- But for me, the money was gonna come. - Regardless. - Money comes and goes.
It's gonna come regardless, which is why I never stopped
doin' what I was doin' because the money was great.
It was awesome. But when I didn't have any money, this is the way
I played the game of football, which is why I never stopped.
- Even with—and to go a step further
you talk about the Hall of Fame
and everybody realizes when you're in the Hall of Fame
obviously, there are financial opportunities
well outside of that, and so I was well aware of that
and I had some Hall of Famers even told me—they was like
"Man, you gonna mess up these opportunities."
You know, for me, I'm just like Chad, you know?
Money comes and goes.
If I had to, you know, if I'm put in a situation
where I gotta choose money over my family and friends
I'mma choose my family and friends all day.
And it was just, it was sad to see how
the media, again, they didn't allow themselves
an opportunity to know who we are as people
and they went into the perception
of who they thought we were
and again, we just went out there
and we just had fun with the game.
- It makes it more interesting to have the villains
to have someone to talk about. There has to be a bad guy.
- There has to be. - They have to, but it's unfair, like you said
because, again, how can you justify Tom Brady doin'
or sayin' some of the same things that I've done—
- Right. - Showing emotion.
- Right, yelling the F-word at the stands.
- Right. Exactly. I've seen him curse out coaches.
I've seen him berate his own teammates. - Yeah, right.
- But he's looked at and upon as a leader, a champion, you know?
- You know what, if I had to do it again
honestly, to restart and had to do it again
I'd do it the exact same way.
I wouldn't change s--t.
- So T.O. just surprised us. - Right.
- Like, we were hangin' out with Chad Johnson, in comes T.O.
Those two are really like brothers.
- Oh, I thought he came because he was like
"Damn, Simms is there. Let me go hang out with him."
I'm pretty sure that's why he came by.
- You think so? - I think so.
I'm pretty cool. - That's great.
Well, see, that's the truth he believes
but what he's saying, it's not really honest.
And sometimes we hear coaches talk, and we go
"That's not the truth."
So it's time for a little bit of "Coach Speak."
All right, Simms, first one, you're doin' it.
Marrone comes out and says, "I did it to try
and get a spark from this team to put everyone on notice."
That's the reason he benched Bortles.
- Right. - What's the truth?
- The truth is: "Ha ha ha ha!
The old 'spark the team by benching the quarterback' trick.
Uh, think they bought that one?
I mean, come on. You guys are watchin' the game.
This guy can't throw the football.
What am I supposed to do? No wonder nobody wanted this job
when they first tried to hire me."
- All right, so, Vrabel went for two
at the end of the game against the Chargers. - Yup.
- And after the game, he said, you know
"We put a lot of faith into our players.
Face the same situation, I'd like to think I'd do it the same way."
What he really wanted to say is
"Hey, guys, here's the truth.
I'm a linebacker, and I think like a linebacker.
I put two fingers in the air and I say, 'Get me the win.'
Did I want a slant from Mariota at the 1?
No. My OC, what are you doin'?!
You got a mobile quarterback and Derrick Henry.
Figure it out!"
All right, Vrabel.
- Doug Pederson, my coach of my Eagles—
man, he looks teary-eyed in that photo—
sayin', "Pressure's off, man.
We can go and play and have fun and just relax."
But what he's really thinking is
"Ahhh! What the hell is goin' on?!
We won the Super Bowl, and now I'm losing control of everything
and Carson Wentz can't do it all by himself
and my defense is falling apart! What the f--k?!"
So that took a lot out of me. - Oh, it should've.
- That one was a little personal. - I liked it.
- So, last week, we said that every coach should really wonder
"What would Bill Belichick do?"
And we made bracelets.
WWBBD? What Would Bill Belichick Do?
And we have letters here for all the coaches in the NFL.
So if it's a time-management issue, if it's salary
if it's comments— come on.
Put one in there for Doug Marrone.
- OK, fine. Sure. - We're gonna send these
to all the coaches in the NFL so that if they ever reach
a point where they don't know what to do
they can ask themselves, "What would Belichick do?"
- We're so nice. We're so giving here
at the "Simms & Lefkoe" show. - I'm not gonna lie.
I wore this home. - Right. - And this morning
I took a shower, and I'm getting ready for work today
and it actually made me uncomfortable. - Yeah.
Cuz I thought about how would Bill Belichick shower—
- Right. - And I legitimately took it off.
- Better than you. Better than you.
- [Imitating Bill Belichick] "17 scrubs, 12 brushes. Put my socks on."
It freaked me out. Like, it legitimately freaked me out.
- Yeah, I mean, he's a machine, and there's no doubt about it.
- Hi, I'm Peyton Manning. And you're watchin'
"Simms & Lefkoe" on Bleacher Report.
I don't love it, but you will.
- We are not even halfway through the NFL season yet
but you believe there are four teams
that have already punched their ticket
to get a bye in the first round of the playoffs.
You believe the top two seeds in the NFC, AFC already sewn up.
- It's done. Finito. - It's not even Week 8 yet.
- Like that? That was Pat Shurmur. Finito.
- That was great, but it's not even Week 8 yet.
- Yeah, that's OK. I'm good at this.
- All right. So who?
- The Rams, the 1 seed. Lock it in, OK?
The Saints, the 2 seed, lock it in.
- No other team can come and take a spot?
- I don't see it. I think they're a cut above the rest in the NFC.
- What about the AFC? - The AFC?
First-round bye, Kansas City Chiefs.
First-round bye, New England Patriots.
Lock it in. - 100 percent?
- Yes, they are the cream of the crop— - Guaranteed?
- In that conference, no doubt.
- Simms staple! Lefkoe lock! - Oracle!
- Guaranteed. - Oracle.
- Write it in permanent marker! - Write it in permanent ink!
[Needle buzzing]
- All right, Simms, you said ink. - I said ink.
Let's have it, bro. - You like 'em? NFC, AFC.
- Looks good, man. It really does.
- Thanks, bro.
- Just I'm a little scared of the Vikings and Kirk Cousins, dude.
- You can't do this. I just got this done.
- They got lasers, man. We can always update 'em.
It's like power rankings. You're all good.
- We've got ourselves a winner.
Tony "The Dragon" nailed the Broncos last week.
I'm gonna be honest.
I don't think he actually watched the game
but it doesn't matter because The Dragon is alive and well.
This week, the revenge of Brocktober
takin' on his old Texans.
Let's see who Tony takes.
[Sniffing] You smell that?
- Smells good, right? - It does smell good.
It's also the smell of success. Why, Tony?
Because the Broncos won.
I have $113.65— - Wow. That's great.
- With your name on it. - Thank you very much.
- Yeah. You watched the game, though, right?
- Oh, yes, of course I did. - And you felt good?
- They blew them out. That was a great game.
- I was sittin' there goin', "The Dragon breathes fire."
All right, so this Thursday,
the 4-3 Miami Dolphins with Brock Osweiler
head to Houston, the 4-3 Texans, and Deshaun Watson.
- I like the Texans already.
- You do? - Yes.
- Just by that? - Just by that.
- It's a big favorite, though, Tony.
It's 7.5 points. - 7.5 points, huh? Wow, that's a lot of numbers.
- You're gonna do another 250 of my dollars?
Because I'd like to come back next week.
- Yeah. I want you to come back next week, too.
- I know. - Uh—
- Final answer? - I'll take the Dolphins. 7.5 points.
- Ah, s--t. I really wanted you to take the Texans.
- You did? - Yeah, but now
you've already said it.
So you're goin' Dolphins? - Dolphins all the way.
Let me get a Dolphins— don't leave me hangin'.
Dolphins. - Dolphins.
- So, The Dragon—and I tried to convince him
not to after the shoot— - Don't you touch my Dragon.
I have him trained the way I would like to train him.
- So you agree with him? - He's my little Toothless dragon.
- Dolphins plus-7.5? - Yes, I do.
- Wow. - What, are we gonna listen to you? - Brock Osweiler against the defense
that's gonna want revenge? - Oh, I know, revenge.
No, it's too many points. On the road.
Yes, I don't think they're gonna win the game
but they're gonna cover the spread.
I'm ridin' with The Dragon.
- If you watched "Monday Night Football"
you may have seen this kid dressed up
like Odell Beckham Jr. - What a cutie.
- And it gave us the idea for "Simms & Lefkoe."
Next week is Halloween. - Yeah.
- I wanna see more kids dressed up
as players or coaches in the NFL.
I mean, I want pictures like this.
- I mean, that's a classic right there.
Actual, life-sized cheeks there for Andy Reid.
- He's even doing the same thing with his eyes
that Andy does when he looks at the play sheet.
Or little Ditka.
- Oh, Ditka. I love the vest. That is unbelievable.
The mustache looks real. Who wins in a fight?
Hurricane Ditka or Ditka?
- I'm takin' this kid. - I'm goin' with Ditka.
- So send us a picture or video of your kid
dressed up like a player or coach
#NFLKids, and we will put them
on the show next week for Halloween.
And your son is gonna be dressing up
as Phil Simms? Chris Simms?
- Nope, he's goin' with Thanos this year.
- Thanos. - The evil villain.
He's still in shock that the Avengers lost that.
That was groundbreaking.
- And yet he's dressing up as Thanos?
- Thanos was kinda cool.
My little girl's gonna be a farmer.
That's what she's gonna be.
Don't know what else to tell you.
- Thanks for participating in #NFLKids, Chris Simms.
- Sorry, you didn't tell me until today. Too late.
- For Simms. - Peace out, homies.
- I am the L-E-F-K-O-E. - Man.
- And we will holler at you next week.
Enjoy the games, everybody.
♪♪
- I'm definitely faster than he is. He's quicker, he's quicker–
- We can go out there and race right now. We have f--kin' cameras.
- He does not want that. I guarantee.
- The street is there. We can race right now in the middle of the street.
- There's a parking lot. - Sixty, I'mma blow your doors off.
- I'm a f--kin' cheetah, man, get the f--k outta here. - Sixty, I'mma blow your doors off.
- So, I'm gonna say, one, you're wearing jeans. - These are Tech Stretch from H&M, okay?
Tech Stretch. I can move.
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